Pregnancy Soundtrack

Hello 3rd trimester!  It's hard to believe that Baby Campos will be here in three more months!  It seems like only yesterday we were doing pub crawls and crawfish boils and Texas football was ranked in the top five.  Now we're doing baby showers and baby proofing and OU still sucks.  But just in case you missed anything over the past six months, here's a little recap of the first two trimesters.  Much like they do on GLEE (Mommy's new obsession and Daddy's dirty secret), we'll use the power of music to help tell the story.  FYI, it may help to sing the melody when you recognize a song =)

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1st Trimester

Memorial Day 2010 was anything but a MANIC MONDAY.  That was until Mommy walked out of the bathroom ready to CRY ME A RIVER and showed Daddy THE SIGN (a little blue "+").  But like robots, BOYS DON'T CRY.  Still, they were both overwhelmed with SWEET EMOTION until they SUDDENLY realized that THE TIMES THEY ARE A CHANGING. Even though they could no longer PARTY LIKE IT'S 1999, they welcomed this new lifestyle with OPEN ARMS.

For weeks the couple kept their MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE, secretly reading books on BABY, BABY, BABY and ordering non-alcoholic beer to deflect SUSPICIOUS MINDS.  But all these FOOLISH GAMES wouldn't last long.  People started to have MORE THAN A FEELING that something was up, and it's hard to keep a POKER FACE when nausea makes you WEAK and you can no longer hide those HUNGRY EYES for weird cravings.  Then FINALLY, after the first doctor's visit and an unanticipated sonogram, they saw Baby Campos for THE FIRST TIME and knew that EVERYTHING'S GONNA BE ALRIGHT.

2nd Trimester

After HANGIN' TOUGH for the first few months, Mommy and Daddy could now SHOUT out the good news!  Both families were OVERJOYED and quick to offer whatever HELP! and support they could.  Most friends were like "YEAH!", but some felt a BITTERSWEET SYMPHONY knowing that these parents-to-be wouldn't be hanging out IN DA CLUB for awhile.  With the secret out and the belly IN BLOOM, even STRANGERS IN THE NIGHT would give kind glances, but Mommy's evil stare would let them know that U CAN'T TOUCH THIS bump. 

So as SUMMERTIME winded down, the couple was SO ANXIOUS for the next ultrasound. NO SURPRISES wanted, they had to know the gender.  Blue or PINK, either color is better than getting YELLOW baby gifts.  HANGING BY A MOMENT, the doctor AT LAST revealed that they were having a BROWN EYED GIRL.  Smiles covered their faces like an UMBRELLA as they started to IMAGINE a future with GUYS & DOLLS talk for Mommy and 21 GUNS for Daddy. 

Soon this pregnancy will come to the END OF THE ROAD.  But when that BEAUTIFUL DAY arrives, these parents-to-be have already made THE PROMISE to love their DAUGHTER with HEART & SOUL.

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*Gossip (Baby) Girl challenge: Can you can name all the artists for the songs without using the Internet? (IN: Facebook stalking OUT: Googling yourself)

Hear No Evil

During the last weeks of the 2nd trimester, the baby's hearing is becoming fully developed.  Soon she'll be able to pick up other sounds besides Mommy's voice.  Like most God-fearing parents, we'll eventually use "earmuffs" to shield curse words and derogatory comments from her innocent ears.  Until that time comes, we're definitely excited about exposing Baby Campos to as many sounds as possible: witty conversation, MA-17 TV, Toby's bark, Angry Birds sound effects, etc...

Most experts seem to think that music can be the most stimulating.  Whether it's a soothing melody from elevator music or a pulsating techno beat from a Persian's car, this little audiophile will most likely break dance to anything that vibrates the womb.  But is it too early for Baby Campos to start working on her rhythm?  If she ends up needing a few pointers, Mommy will be there to teach the proper "hair toss" technique while Daddy can choreograph a precise "mirror dance" (patent pending).  Even if she never finds her rhythm, anything is better than our little princess slow dancing at a sock hop with a sweaty boy that can't control his hormones or busy hands.

For this installment of "What's Hot/What's Not," Gossip (Baby) Girl takes a closer look at a few celebrity images with a Fisher Price microscope.  Apparent Disney sweetheart Demi Lovato is being sent to rehab for anger issues, while convicted Cash Money inmate Lil' Wayne is getting released from prison early for good behavior.  Maybe a good girl acting bad isn't as cool as a bad guy doing good?
(IN: Nelly selflessly fundraising, OUT: Britney Spears sexually harassing)



Humidity In Houston With a Chance of Showers

This past weekend in Houston was our 1st baby shower!  Evelyn and Christian (and Lily) were gracious enough to host this event at their beautiful home.  We're grateful that a lot of our family and friends were able to make it down.  It's definitely a blessing that there are so many wonderful people in our lives.  Everything was perfect (besides a certain football game) and we had an amazing time.  Baby Campos thanks everyone for all the wonderful gifts, especially all the custom-made onesies!

After celebrating Halloween this weekend as well, we started to think about how different it will be this time next year.  The days of worrying about finding a sexy (read: "slutty") costume for Mommy and a cool (read: "slutty") costume for Daddy will be a distant memory.  There's less pressure to find an appropriate outfit for a baby, you just have to make sure it's not flammable or offensive to that church in Florida (I think Tim Tebow is a member).  As our little monster gets older, we'll eventually have to start brushing up on what's trendy with the kids.  But until then, at least we'll have a lot of free candy for the next few years =)

What an Emo EGGPLANT

Hello Week 25!  Over the next month, Baby Campos will really start to pack on the fat and round out into a 2 pound eggplant.  Like a good little parasite, she's also soaking up plenty of antibodies to help build a strong immune system for when she breaks her lease with the womb.  Not wanting to be selfish by only taking away valuable nutrients, she's also giving back.  Too bad the gift of hormones is making Mommy EMO.

Throughout the day, there's a potential double rainbow of emotions that can be felt.  A bad dream: sad tears.  Disappointing lunch: angry tears.  Folding baby clothes: happy tears.  Shake Weight commercials: confused tears.  It's not like Mommy is a robot when she isn't barefoot and pregnant.  But after spending her "awkward years" listening to The Smiths and more recently experimenting with skinny jeans, you'd think that she'd be more in tune with her feelings.  Sometimes letting it all out is a good thing.  Just not while dining at a restaurant...people might think that Daddy just dumped his Baby Mama.

In this edition of "What's Hot/What's Not," Gossip (Baby) Girl spotlights the latest trend in Hollywood: pregger celebrities.  From Beyonce rumors to Lily Allen announcements, getting knocked up definitely makes you cool!  Well, that is unless you get pregnant before prom.  Because whether you're Jamie Lynn Spears or Quinn Fabray, no matter how popular you are, don't be surprised when your Facebook friend count goes belly-up. (IN: Pregnant Celebrities on TMZ, OUT: Teen Moms on MTV)

OCD and Nesting. Nesting. Nesting...

Around this month, the overwhelming urge to "nest" starts to build.  An almost primal instinct to prep your home for the new addition takes over.  A lot of soon-to-be parents actually find comfort in being able to control at least this aspect of  the pregnancy.  But for a couple like the Camposes, all the cleaning then disinfecting,  measuring then resizing, organizing then resorting, can easily turn into an OCD nightmare.

First thing's first, the home needs to be more baby-friendly.  Over the next few months, all the mystery cabinets will be locked, every deadly-corner padded, and each of the inappropriately designed "smiley face" outlets will be plugged.  But is this death trap really safe enough for Baby Campos?  The next step is deciding what to keep and what to get rid of so that there's ample space for a growing baby.  Maybe Daddy really doesn't need to keep those golf clubs from high school.  Or perhaps Mommy could donate some of the several dozen pairs of shoes filling the closet.  Can the beer pong table be used as a changing table?

No matter how obsessed we can get with all this nesting, the whole process really makes you sift through the things in life to see what's really important.  Once we finally got the crib up (which Daddy and Grampa Campos triumphantly built), we figured that maybe the things worth keeping should all be able to fit inside.

Hmmm, maybe we need a bigger crib?

Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bump

"I've noticed that the side effects of pregnancy are greatly amplified: the morning sickness, the mood swings, sleepiness, sexual appetite.  Yesterday, just scooping the middle out of a honeydew melon gave me a huge...well it turned me on."
~Arnold Schwarzenegger, JUNIOR (1994)

With so many new and strange things going on inside a mother-to-be's belly, it's easy to get overwhelmed with worry.  Most questions can be answered by your doctor, a baby book, or even a know-it-all relative, but there are just some things that only a Mommy and her little parasite can relate to.  So at what point do you really start to embrace your pregnancy?

The Epiphany happened when Baby Campos was big enough to make noticeable movements.  The tingly sensation of gas bubbles suddenly became Billy Blanks Tae-bo workouts.  There was a definite sigh of relief to know that she was finally moving around.  Over the next couple of weeks, this spunky girl became a "mood ring" for what Mommy was feeling:

eating a donut = belly high fives

listening to loud music = happy feet

greg davis plays = headbutting the bladder

Even though there will be plenty of back aches, leg cramps, and general discomfort down the road, you have to learn to really enjoy being pregnant.  Because each new experience with this little girl just means that there will be one less thing to worry about, and one more reason to fall in love with this BUMP!



If Mama No, Then PAPAYA

This bump is really starting to show now!  During Weeks 22-24, Baby Campos will plump up to about 1.5 pounds  and grow to the size of a papaya.  It's funny, this exotic fruit from our neighbors to the south  (or unwelcome immigrants if you live in Arizona) is often called "pawpaw" in Spanish.  Hmmm, could that be this little chica's first word?

Whichever name she utters first, Mommy and Daddy already know what the dynamic will be in this family.  Call it Good Cop/Bad Cop if you must, but most parents inevitably have to decide which role to play.  Can you guess who'll be the disciplinary and who'll be the pushover?  When it comes to getting her way, there's no doubt she'll quickly learn that "Mama, No" and "Papa, Ya." 

After a brief career, Baby Swami has decided to retire and focus more on watching Texas Football.  Not to worry, our new weekly correspondent, Gossip (Baby) Girl, is here with updates and insight on everything Hollywood.  First up, season premieres!
While most channels are on parental block, this little critic still caught some of her favorite shows.  GLEE performed better than COMMUNITY, and MODERN FAMILY was more lovable than PARENTHOOD.  Does that mean high school will rock more than college?  Is a funny dysfunctional family better than one with drama?

Anyway, be sure to also tune in every week for the "what's hot/what's not" picks, sponsored by In-N-Out.  (IN: Sharktopus, OUT: Lone Star)